You Are Who You Need To Be:Comparisons Always Fail You


Over the past few months, we’ve looked at four mighty women in Jesus’s genealogy. All lived sinful or abused or despised lives. Despite their reputations and upbringing, each woman defied society’s definition of her life and left a legacy for Christ.

Who are you?

  1. Tamar–Jacob believed she killed his sons. He deceived Tamar when promising to marry her to his youngest son, Shelah. Forced to play the prostitute, she proved Judah to be the wicked one. When she bore him twins, she became an ancestor of Jesus.
  2. Rahab–a prostitute. Period. Bible scholars sometimes malign her because she lied when she hid the spies. Yet this prostitute had faith which saved her family. She, too, overcame her past and became an ancestor of Christ.
  3. Ruth–A foreigner, perhaps on par with today’s illegal immigrants. She ignored Naomi’s advice to stay in Moab and followed her to Israel. Here she worked hard, defied social norms, and married Boaz. Her faith-filled story is one of the most romantic in the Bible.
  4. Bathsheba–beautiful and sexually used. David’s lust killed her husband, and as a consequence of his sin, her baby died. She rose above this, maintained David’s love and her ambition made Solomon one of the wisest kings of Israel.

Your past does not define you.

  1. Stop comparing yourself to others. You may not be rich or talented or beautiful. You may live in a trailer, and work a minimum wage. You may be a stay-at-home mom. Perhaps you can’t homeschool your kids, be a deacon in church or oversee a youth group. Working committees and non-profits send you over the edge.
    1. However, you are fearfully and wonderfully made (Ps 139:14). God knew you in the womb (Jer. 1:5).
    2. The Lord has a calling designed for you (Eph. 4:1).
    3. YOU are who you’re supposed to be, however, you must act worthy of your calling.
  2. Stop allowing your past to control your future. I hear beautiful stories of friends who from their youth have been good. They found God early, lived in good homes and only committed the foibles common to all humans. Not me. For too many years I allowed my past to inform my present and thus hamper my future. Each of these women had hardship–and beyond hardships in their lives.
    1. Tamar–blamed for her husbands’ sins
    2.  Rahab–slept with a lot of men (what did she have to do to cope with this lifestyle? Drink a lot? Consort with the lowlife of Jericho? Endure taunts?
    3. Ruth–a widow and immigrant from a group despised by the Israelites. As a woman, she was poor and had few means to support herself.
    4. Bathsheba–had it all until David discovered her.
  3. Recognize by faith who you are in Christ. 
    1. You are a new creation (2 Cor. 5:17)
    2. He cleanses us from all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9)
    3. There is no condemnation (Read all of Romans 8)
    4. We are God’s beloved children (1 John 3:1-2) 

Too often, women are relegated to irrelevancy both in church and society. That is not who God made you to be. Aside from the above ladies, think of Deborah, Mary Magdelene, Priscilla, Dorcas, Miriam, Joanna, Esther, Lydia, Abigail, and more.

Jesus did not despise women. He did not think of them as second-class citizens. Like their male counterparts, they were sinful, human, noble, fearless, cowardly–but the greats have faith.

Believe in Christ Jesus, and your past is forgiven.

My books

Struggles. We all do. The question is: how do we overcome them? In my novels, you find answers. Check them out.

All my work contains women from different walks of life–rich, poor, religious, and atheist. Their pasts (and presents) have issues. All work contains redemption and humor and love. Check them out on my book page.





  1. “YOU are who you’re supposed to be,”—- if we would only accept this truth, our lives would be so different. Carol, as usual, you nailed your subject: the difficulties women face, although the same applies to men.

  2. What powerful words you’ve written, Carol, in your last several blogs about women of the Bible! Thank you. May your posts uplift and encourage all who read them as they have uplifted and encouraged me. Blessings to you!

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