Advice on Overbearing People

By: Carol McClain      carol_mcclain



Do you have to work, associate, or go to church with an overbearing person who monopolizes everything and thinks only of him/herself?

Of course you do. We all run into people in our lives who drive us nuts.

This past weekend I attended a book signing with a marketing group I belong to. The purpose of our organization is to help each other sell our work. Most of the members comply.

Sadly, I was stuck next to an overbearing woman. Whenever a patron glanced our way, she’d call out and cause them to step forward. She’d stick her book in their hands and proceed to tell them how it was about her life, and how she spoke at women’s groups. Once she sold the book, she then handed them a sign-up sheet so the could be notified when the study guide was completed. People, whether interested or not, signed.

After this five minute pitch, the wary customer would move on.

Oh, for me, the green-eyed monster did his best to tear me apart. My sales tanked–not because of her or anything else–I’m not casting blame. However, this woman’s arrogant attitude gnawed me to the very center of my soul. I’m not a person given to tears, but this day I succumbed.

Advice on Overbearing People

  1. You can’t do anything about them. In my situation, it was a one day deal. In your life or other situations, you and I will have to speak with them (and I’ll deal with that topic in the next blog) and resolve the issue.
  2. Here’s the KEY. You can’t change other people. Sounds like bad news and not what you read this blog for. The answer is, you can change yourself.
    1. Take a deep breath. Stop and pray.
    2. Remove yourself from the situation if you can. I couldn’t this past weekend, but in other events, I will place myself at a distance from her.
    3. Forgive. (again–a later blog). Forgiveness has nothing to do with condoning the behavior. This woman was out of line, but she’s God’s saint and His responsibility. Forgiveness has to do with you. I went home. If I didn’t forgive, I’d take her with me in my brain, and she’d torment me for days to come. Forgiveness helps relieve our pain.
    4. The key to this blog: You can only change yourself.




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