My Pear Butter is Equal to My Singing

A pear     Blessed with more pears than anyone has the right to own, I decided to make pear butter. Never having done something before has never been a deterrent to me. So I began:

  1. I ran off a recipe. Of course when googling information, the first item the search turns up is the most reliable, right? This one ran 36 pages. Unfortunately, I walked away from my computer after I hit print.
  2. It took me three hours to chop and seed all those pears, mash them down and food mill them into puree. I added spices and let it cook. My house smelled like heaven. Page thirteen had the details on about this portion–I should have taken the hint from the number of the page.
  3. I plopped the glop into my slow cooker. Page 24 said this process would take a long time and a slow cooker would guarantee my results. (They didn’t tell me what the results would be–it might have been page 33 where my printer ran out of ink and I thought I’d wing it.)
  4. Two days later, the butter was burnt–inedible. It glued the removable pot of my slow cooker to the base. I attempted to pry it off and the base separated from the guts, all the wires fell out and my house didn’t smell so hot.

     Hint: If a recipe is more than ten lines long, go to the store and buy it or go to search result # 2 on google. If you persevered to the end of this article, you know exactly how well I sing.

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No Comments

  1. Angie, do so. My friend gave me a simple recipe for apple butter. So much better!

  2. Too cute! I think I'll find a simple recipe.

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